My Character Traits - Topher's Life
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My Character Traits

My Character Traits

There are many character traits, various personalities, and both can include positive and negative traits. In my therapy session yesterday, we discussed if our character traits and personalities are genetic inherencies or learned behavior. I think it depends on certain traits of my own because I see that I have some traits that are similar to my parents, while I believe the other traits I have learned over my journey through life.

My therapist asked me this question: “What are your three-character traits that make you who you are today?” My answer: Honesty, Determination, and Transparency.

Character Trait – Honesty:
Now that doesn’t mean that I am unable to lie, I have in the past and it doesn’t do anything other than keeping track of your lies. I am an honest person. I believe in being honest, even when telling a lie can save you from severe consequences. A lie will find you out and the truth will eventually surface. One of my favorite quotes is “I’d rather fuck the truth than love a lie.” A lie may not seem harmless but what do you have to hide or are you scared of what others think about you? That was my issue a while back. I’ve noticed that when I am just straight up and honest, there is no reason for others to try to figure me out. If what I tell then doesn’t match my character, then something must not be right. Being honest with myself with past mistakes, my flaws, and my identity brings so much freedom to my inner self.

Character Trait – Determination:
I am not one to easily give up on things. Sometimes I keep trying to knock the damn door down until I see that’s it can’t be open, just yet. Giving up for me is not an option. I am determined to keep pushing though this roadblock. I am determined to be successful. I am determined to keep thriving. Why? Well, for one I have gone through so much that I am not going to be a statistic and secondly, I want to give other people opportunities to be successful in their lives. I guess my determination is not selfish and its definitely not to prove to anyone anything about me. I don’t need to prove shit. I have others’ interests in mind. Now in the past, I would have given up easily. I felt at times just giving up on myself. Something inside me though, has kept that spark going. Giving up for me is not an option. Determination is a priority.

Character Trait – Transparency:
Now, in my opinion, this is somewhat related to honesty because if I couldn’t be honest with myself and others, I couldn’t be open about me, myself, and I. Being so open about myself and my life, I have nothing to fear. I am just being who I am, which is me. To waste that time and energy worrying about what the other person things about me, I no longer do that. My transparency can encourage others to do the same. We all go through rough times in life and you can’t tell what someone is going through from just glancing at them. I have a client I did some work for and when I started to ask questions about how why he decided to do what he does for work, he shared his past and I was definitely surprised. He only opened up to me because of my transparency, at least that’s what he told me. So, I see my transparency as a great characteristic trait to have.

“Who were you in the past?”

I definitely was a people pleaser. I care about what other people thought about me. I tried to fit in and feel a sense of belonging. I think what stood in the way was my lack of honest with myself and with others. I was too concerned about others and neglected myself. But I had to go through everything to get where I am today and realize who I am now.

“What do you want to be in the future?”

I am doing it now. I am on a path to just use my life and experiences and help others along the way who are going through hard times in life. I want to be able to help people thrive and do better in life. I want to be able to run my company successfully and give second chances to those who society won’t give a chance. I am not a religious or church going person anymore, but the scripture does say “give clothes to the naked, feed the hungry, visit those in hospitals, and visit those in prison.” These people are the least of the least and the worst of the worst. Those are the individuals I want to give hope and encouragement. They are the ones forgotten and have to do what they do in order to get through the day. I believe in second chances and want to be one who doesn’t judge someone based on their past, but solely based on their character.

Writing this was a great inventory tool for myself reflection to see where I am headed and make sure I am staying on the course. Just a reminder, just be who you are and don’t be enslaved to the thoughts of others. Be authentic, Be you.

“Character, like a photograph, develops in darkness.” – Yousuf Karsh

Stay Positive!

-Topher!

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